Claudia Jean

Head's Up!

2008-08-08T15:37:00.000-07:00

I have moved my blog onto my website so come on over and let's catch up!!!

Claudia Jean
www.claudiajean.com

Poz Body Talk #10

2008-07-31T09:33:00.000-07:00

Self Engaged
___________________

A great relationship results when both parties think they got a great deal.

Does your mind think it got a great deal with your body?
YES? Celebrate!
No? Then set a goal. Put your mind on notice that there will be new rules of engagement.

Post-it cue:

Great Deal
Body & Soul

Re-focus ~ Re-frame ~ Re-gain Self

Poz Body Talk # 9

2008-07-23T20:12:00.000-07:00

Self Loved
___________________

“Feeling bad about yourself activates stress centers in the brain that can actually lead to disease,” reports Peter Muennig, M.D. whose recent study showed that women who liked their bodies (whether thin or overweight) felt sick 30% less often than women who wished they were thinner.

Post-it cue:

Love
'as is’

Re-focus ~ Re-frame ~ Re-gain Self

Put one Post-it on your computer screen, one on your bathroom mirror,
one on your frig and one anywhere else you may spend repeated time during the day.

The act of writing imprints the truth on your mind.
Every time you see your handwriting again, it further imprints your mind.

To increase the value of this process, smile when you see a Post-it.
Smiling signals your mind to increase endorphins and imprint what makes you smile.

Poz Body Talk # 8

2008-07-16T17:15:00.000-07:00

Self Secure
________________________

"The hardest challenge is to be your (physical …CJ) self in a world where everyone is trying to make you be somebody else."
~ e. e. cummings

“Thank you” to Diana Chernofsky for sending this celebrity inspiration:

Consider Lauren Hutton who, despite a large gap between her front teeth, rose to super-model fame and is still beautifully herself growing older. Although she would wear a filler early in her career, as her fame grew she often convinced photographers to capture her natural gap-toothed beauty. Now that’s model living!

Post-it cue: BE!

Re-focus ~ Re-frame ~ Re-gain Self

Put one Post-it on your computer screen, one on your bathroom mirror,
one on your frig and one anywhere else you may spend repeated time during the day.

The act of writing imprints the truth on your mind.
Every time you see your handwriting again, it further imprints your mind.

To increase the value of this process, smile when you see a Post-it.
Smiling signals your mind to increase endorphins and imprint what makes you smile.

Poz Body Talk #7

2008-07-09T08:40:00.000-07:00

Self Acknowledged
__________________________

It is said that a smile, which signals safety and friendship to another, is the shortest distance between two people. A smile creates an even shorter message from your conscious Self through your subconscious Self to your body Self.

Proof:
Close your eyes, take a deep breath, hold for four counts, now smile. What you feel is endorphins, the loooooove hormone, releasing throughout your body.

Start and end each day with this practice as your “Hello” and “Thank you” to your amazing body. Repeat often throughout the day in affirmation of “I love you!”

Post-it cue:

Smile
to Self

Re-focus ~ Re-frame ~ Re-gain Self

Put one Post-it on your computer screen, one on your bathroom mirror,
one on your frig and one anywhere else you may spend repeated time during the day.

The act of writing imprints the truth on your mind.
Every time you see your handwriting again, it further imprints your mind.

To increase the value of this process, smile when you see a Post-it.
Smiling signals your mind to increase endorphins and imprint what makes you smile.

Dee Sanford Wrote ~

2008-07-01T20:24:00.000-07:00

Unfortunately, from childhood, women are subconsciously encouraged to verbally express dissatisfaction to the very body that has to last us a lifetime. Who or what can flourish in negativity? Nothing! No wonder our bodies turn on us! We have told it such terrible things and criticized it, and not loved and accepted its curves and sexiness, and appreciated its very important role in containing our spirit!

Having had a weight problem all my life, I cursed and criticized myself. I never lost one pound behind it, and always felt inferior when comparing myself to slender friends or images on TV and in magazines. I learned to get past all that, and learned to love and accept my body years ago. Turns out it was the best thing that could have happened. That way I could love myself. It also made it easier for others to love me.

We won’t all be naturally slender, tall, with perky breasts, a flat stomach, shapely legs and hips, and all those body parts that spell “perfection” to a world of folks who could care less about us. So what? We are perfect in God’s eyes. He fashioned us wonderfully and I am thankful for this body I have. Thanks for reminding us!
Dee Sanford

Dee is a Make a Difference Woman of the highest order. Check her out at
www.deesanford.com. ...CJ

Poz Body Talk #6

2008-07-01T17:05:00.000-07:00

Self Aware
_________________

‘Speak’ to your body directly...

...as to a lover.

With your dominant hand write, “Hello body.”

Close your eyes, breathe deeply and feel the message flow from head to toe.

When all internal ‘ears and eyes’ are open you will feel a warm buzz of awareness.

Open your eyes and, with your non-dominant hand, write, “I love you.”

Feel the endorphin rush.

Repeat

Post-it cue:

Hello body
I love you

Re-focus ~ Re-frame ~ Re-gain Self

Put one Post-it on your computer screen, one on your bathroom mirror,
one on your frig and one anywhere else you may spend repeated time during the day.

The act of writing imprints the truth on your mind.
Every time you see your handwriting again, it further imprints your mind.

To increase the value of this process, smile when you see a Post-it.
Smiling signals your mind to increase endorphins and imprint what makes you smile.

A GREAT Strategic Life-Plan

2008-06-29T12:25:00.000-07:00

Dream what you want to dream;
Go where you want to go;
Be what you want to be,
Because you have only one life
And one chance to do all the things
You want to do.

May you have enough happiness to make you sweet,
Enough trials to make you strong,
Enough sorrow to keep you human and
Enough hope to make you happy.

The happiest of people don't necessarily
Have the best of everything;
They just make the most of
Everything that comes along their way.

The brightest future will always
Be based on a forgiven past;
Treat every 'failure' as an opportunity and
Embrace heartache as proof of your ability to love
And good will follow you all the days of your life.

When you were born, you were crying
And everyone around you was smiling
Live your life so at the end
You're the one who is smiling and everyone
Around you is crying.

- Anonymous (plus a little rewrite by CJ)

Poz Body-Talk #5

2008-06-26T20:05:00.000-07:00

Self Mentored
____________________________________________

Mentors guide, instruct and support personal growth. Collect names and articles of celebrity or famous mentors of poz body-talk. For example:
Newsweek, Oct 30, 2006: Movie star Kirsten Dunst is quoted as saying, “I would never fix my teeth—if someone asked me to, I wouldn’t work with them. It’s part of me. Messed up teeth are character.” Now that’s Poz!

As for me, I fondly remember Cher’s early crooked teeth as a mark of beauty--maybe because my own are not picket fence straight!

Start a list of famous people with ‘character.’ Add Kirsten to that list.

As you find more, add them to our blog or email them to Claudia@claudiajean.com and I will share them on future Post-its.

Post-it cue:

‘Character’
Dunst

Re-focus ~ Re-frame ~ Re-gain Self

Put one Post-it on your computer screen, one on your bathroom mirror,
one on your frig and one anywhere else you may spend repeated time during the day.

The act of writing imprints the truth on your mind.
Every time you see your handwriting again, it further imprints your mind.

To increase the value of this process, smile when you see a Post-it.

Smiling signals your mind to increase endorphins and imprint what makes you smile.

Poz Body-Talk #4

2008-06-17T09:46:00.000-07:00

Self Affirmed
_________________________________________

Whenever you start to think or say something unkind about any part of your body, shout STOP! If you are in public, I suggest you only think STOP! at the top of your internal lungs! Or whisper STOP! STOP! STOP! to yourself.

For those more advanced, use the STOP! tactic every time you judge another woman’s body harshly.

Expect your conscious mind to argue with you but it is ‘not the boss of you,’ your body, mind and spirit combined are YOU.

Finally, borrow a tip from Kitty Carlisle who each night would look directly at herself in the mirror and say, “I forgive you.”

Post-it cue:

STOP!
I forgive

Re-focus ~ Re-frame ~ Re-gain Self

Put one Post-it on your computer screen, one on your bathroom mirror,
one on your frig and one anywhere else you may spend repeated time during the day.

The act of writing imprints the truth on your mind.
Every time you see your handwriting again, it further imprints your mind.

To increase the value of this process, smile when you see a Post-it.
Smiling signals your mind to increase endorphins and imprint what makes you smile.

Poz Body-Talk #3

2008-06-10T15:47:00.000-07:00

Self Determined
______________________________________________

Be on fire ~ physically, mentally and spiritually.

“I build my fire for myself. Should you choose to warm yourself by that fire, you may. However, under no circumstances will I allow you to steal my wood.”
Lella Ivey

Action ~ Post-it cue:

My fire
My wood

Re-focus ~ Re-frame ~ Re-gain Self

Put one Post-it on your computer screen, one on your bathroom mirror,
one on your frig and one anywhere else you may spend repeated time during the day.

The act of writing imprints the truth on your mind.
Every time you see your handwriting again, it further imprints your mind.

To increase the value of this process, smile when you see a Post-it.
Smiling signals your mind to increase endorphins and imprint what makes you smile.

Poz Body-Talk #2

2008-06-10T15:36:00.000-07:00

Poz(itive) Body-Talk!
Unplug the tendency for negative self-talk…
__________________________________________

Re-focus ~ Re-frame ~ Re-gain Self

Gossipy putdowns are more about us than of whom we speak. Deadly true. As a kind woman you seldom partake yet focusing on what you don’t like about your own body (self-gossip) remains fair game even though it creates inescapable pain.

Suggested change: Every time you say (or think) something negative about yourself or others take a moment to re-focus and re-frame to say (or think) something positive. The more good you say and think the more good you feel toward yourself and show towards others. Win-win.

Bottom line belief: I embrace all of me ~ ‘as is.’

Action ~ Post-it cue:

Gossip
Self
Others

then cover the word Gossip with a slashed circle.

The GOAL: Self, Unconditionally!

Put one Post-it on your computer screen, one on your bathroom mirror,
one on your frig and one anywhere else you may spend repeated time during the day.

The act of writing imprints the truth on your mind.
Every time you see your handwriting again, it further imprints your mind.

To increase the value of this process, smile when you see a Post-it.
Smiling signals your mind to increase endorphins and imprint what makes you smile.

Poz Body-Talk #1

2008-06-10T15:31:00.000-07:00

I care not that my intelligence may be less than Einstein’s ~
I enjoy tennis even though Vanessa Williams would always beat me ~
Likewise my body is beautiful independent of model Gisele Bundchen’s ~

Bottom line belief: I appreciate and am inspired by the diversity around me but do judge myself by its extremes!

Action ~ Using Post-its, list: Einstein, Williams, Bundchen
(or any set of names you admire and whose greatness inspires your own)

Put one Post-it on your computer screen, one on your mirror,
one on your frig and one anywhere else you may spend repeated time during the day.

The act of writing imprints the truth on your mind.
Every time you see your handwriting again, it further imprints your mind.

To increase the value of this process, smile when you see a Post-it.
Smiling signals your mind to increase endorphins and imprint what makes you smile.

Dare to Celebrate! Now Playing!

2008-05-21T12:50:00.000-07:00

Finally! ClaudiaJean.com is officially re-opened.

Introducing the Series!
Dare to Celebrate! Six Steps to Self

Dove’s study across ten nations shows that women around the world suffer from negative body image. Only 2% embrace themselves ‘as is!’ Something’s wrong. Life is too short to be anything less than ‘enough!’

If you are part of the 98%, quiet your inner critic and bring out your inner cheerleader! Maximize the gift that you are, just as you are, specifically in the body you inhabit!

One hears a lot of talk about Mind – Body – Spirit with a heavy emphasis on the mind and the spirit. Dare to Celebrate! Six Steps to Self, provides tools to connect the trio in an honest, three-way, loving embrace of Self—especially your body.

Enjoy the two complimentary videos and printouts. Invest in the Six Steps to Self series to create a healthier mental and physical connection. Your perspective will be forever changed!

Guarantee: If you find that the series has not inspired you as promised, your investment will be cheerfully refunded.

And if you know someone who suffers, pass this on!

In gratitude of a beauty-filled world of which we are all a part,

Claudia Jean

2.0 Video Book Nearing Launch!!!!!

2007-11-21T11:20:00.000-08:00

Things have looked a little quiet on my site but much has been going on in the background!

With the help of the professionals at BizVid, WebDynamix and Magic in Words, we are entering the beta testing phase of my eight-segment video/PowerPoint/eChapters book.

Launch is planned for early 2008!

Happy Holidays and God Bless!

If You Own More Than ONE Diet Book...

2007-08-26T11:55:00.000-07:00

..they obviously don't work--you're smart enough to have gotten it the FIRST time! Yet the diet industry makes billions of dollars a year with the promise of the next best thing to end the torment we feel when we over eat.

If you'd like to have tried your last diet, measured your last serving and hidden your last candy bars, go to my Blog at CelebrationTeam for the full story!(Click on the link)

You too can be diet and yo-yo weight free! It seems too simple to be true but this easy process worked for me, it will work for you! See the comments of those who've experienced the shift in desire for food.

Food is your friend, not your enemy!

See you at the buffet table!!!

The Enchanting San Diego Women's Network (SDWN)

2007-06-09T09:10:00.000-07:00

WOW! What a great group of women and a FUN way to spend an evening--immersed in that mystical magic called 'woman energy!' I don't know exactly what it is but I LOVE being surrounded by it!

I was kindly asked to keynote for the evening, Thursday, June 7, 2007 and to speak on the topic: "Why Blend in When You Can Stand Out! Create Impact As the 'Face' of Your Business."

Looking out at the audience of beautiful smiling faces representing varied races and ages made it so easy reach out and share my passion for each woman's journey to pure, authentic self at exactly the point she is at this moment! We as women have been so conditioned to a false need for 'perfection' that we often don't project a deep regard for who we are and how we look.

SDWN was founded by Mary Jo Wallo, also co-founder of The Blue Thong Society! Lucky me, I had the good fortune to sit at her table and spend a bit of face time with this amazingly busy woman who is a major change agent for women toward positive self concept!

I reconnected with the Zesty Pam Browing, Divine Sky Jeannette and Charming Nancy Clement. San Diego is truly a village when beautiful women keep crossing your path over the years! I am soooooo fortunate to do what I do and meet who I meet!

What I learned: At the end the meeting, Mary Jo spoke to the group and mentioned that the energy in the room was particularly high and gave me some credit for the feeling. I thank her for that accolade. On reflection, I agree that it is my intent to raise the energy in every room where I am honored to speak. I come into every program hoping to unlock a sense of self and to free each woman to 'feel' her individual power as independent of every other 'powerful' woman in the room. The energy we all felt was that unleashed sense that 'I am ALL I need to be--and so are you!' It is a glorious way to live! Let's do more of that!

Thank you dear ladies of SDWN! If you would, please comment to this blog page as to what you personally took out of the meeting. This is several days later so don't be ashamed if only a sense of 'being' is what you have left! Share your tea 'words' and any others you have collected in the meantime! Also, include a link to your website and a few words about why you are passionate about what you do so future visitors can contact you about either my speaking or your business!

If you have time also visit my Networking site www.celebrationteam.net

Until we meet again! BE SEEN, Make a Difference!

Dare to Celebrate Womanhood!

2007-05-03T13:40:00.000-07:00

Invitation open to all teen girls, their moms, grams and girlfriends!

Join us in celebration of the beauty and radiance of being a woman from ages 12 to 112!

This seminar will improve your relationship with all the women in your life--starting with yourself!

Feel free to invite your Gram, your Mom, your daughters, your sis, your best friend or any other wonderful women to join you.

DATE: May 19, 2007
PLACE: San Elijo Recreation Center
TIME: 2 pm to 5 pm
PRICE: There is no charge for this exceptional experience but space is limited. Those who RSVP will have first right to seating.

If attending, please bring a photo of a woman whom you greatly admire, love, or who has inspired you.

To RSVP or for more information, please contact Shawna Allard at 1-800-Knowing.

Organized by the Women of Elijo Club, this special opportunity is being made possible through the generous sponsorship of Claudia Jean, Speaker and Grace Hood, Realtor/Owner of Properties by Hood.

From Networking to Netweaving

2007-02-26T12:03:00.000-08:00

Thursday, February 22 was just the beginning! Marian Ulrich's wonderful group of networking women became The Celebration Team under the direction of Claudia Jean.

What should you expect? What direction will the group take?

Business can only be as strong as the sum total of our personal gifts and talents. The Celebration Team is building success with the focus on a balance of Body-Mind-Spirit-AND-Business.

As we gain strength and stewardship in each element, we create true wealth and the ability to steward even more wealth. Topics will follow the following cycle and build one upon the other.

Body--Physical Wealth: Addressing physical health as it pertains to reducing the stress of being in business. Your business can only be as healthy as you are!

Mind--Mental Wealth: Addressing how mental health both affects and is affected by your business, providing tools for success. Cold calls, anyone???

Spirit--Authentic Self Wealth: Find true purpose, maximize your talents and strengthen your natural gifts to increase your business. You may be able to do anything you want to do but you can only excel when you find what you are meant to do!

Business--Financial Wealth: Presenting specific tactics on how to create more business and better networking skills.

Check out our site for details: www.celebrationteam.net

Next meeting: Thursday May 24
Olympic Resort
8 a.m.

High-On-the-Holiday Tea! November 26

2006-11-07T09:56:00.000-08:00

The PERFECT beginning for a wonderful season!

Luscious Teas-Chocolates-Scones and Tea-wiches
PLUS

Twelve tasty, hot hints to handle havoc and hinder headaches!

Halleluja! Halt Holiday Hassle!

Sunday, November 26, 2006
4:00 to 6:00 p.m.
$25
The Tamarack Inn
Carlsbad, CA

Topics cover Harpy to Harmony, History, Hostessing, Houseguests, Happiness, Housekeeping, Hunk Hanky-Panky and Hush!

DARE to come see what's in store!

Speakers:

CLAUDIA JEAN, Queen of Self-Esteem
Dare to Celebrate!

KATHI BURNS, Maven of Orgainzation
addSpacetoYourLife!

Help Me, I Hurt 6 PM ~ November 20

2006-11-07T09:36:00.000-08:00

Put 'Happy' in the Holidays After Loss--A Special AFFIRMATION TEA featuring wonderful exotic teas, chocolates, scones, and tea-wiches PLUS a moving presentation on strategies to celebrate your aching, loving heart!

Learn how to move from Grief to...

...Self
...Hope
...A lighter heart
...Consolation
...Power

Monday, November 20, 6:00 p.m.
The Tamarack Inn
3200 Carlsbad Blvd
Carlsbad, CA
In the third floor ocean view Conference Room.

Speakers: CLAUDIA JEAN, Queen of Self-Esteem and Dare to Celebrate!

LANCE WARE, Emotional Recovery Therapist, ISIS

Let your grief be the powerhouse that drives you, rather than the ocean that drowns you!

Like Me Tea! Blended to Perfection

2006-07-20T14:09:00.000-07:00

Well! I've gone and done it again! I met a fabulous tea blender and asked him to create not just one but fifteen, yes fifteen, fabulous teas that are really something special! Just like you and me! All different, all fabulous! Can one say fabulous too often? No? Fabulous!

The tea blender's tagline especially caught my attention--'Blended to Perfection!' That is the perfect description for us as amazing women and harks to everything I hope to teach to the world! (When one has fifteen teas, one gets a bit grandiose!)

Suffice it to say my teas are tagged 'Like Me Tea--Blended to Perfection.'

By now you know where this is going! Yes! We are going to have a High Tea that's All About Me! meaning all of us women in all of our glory!

Assorted teas, scones, finger sandwiches and chocolates will be served along with a sweet serving of my new presentation, Create Your Truth! where you will actually move from "Am I?" to "I Am!" It's a very powerful move to make!

I will also be unveiling my new "Esteem Repair Kit" designed to rewrite your personal history and affirm your true value, and that value is enormous! If you or someone you love feels less than perfect, this is a must-attend event. If life is good and your worth well defined, come spread the wealth because the need is great.

Dress to the nines with a hat and gloves or come bare headed. This is a tea about and for just you and we love you just the way you are! And yes, there's air conditioning!

Like Me Tea--Blended to Perfection

Sunday August 13, 2006

2 PM to 4 PM

Palacio Del Mar Clubhouse

Carmel Valley at the I-5

Price: $20

contact: claudia@claudiajean.com

Blended to Perfection! Fabulous!

A Totally 'Into You' Cruise

2006-07-20T13:18:00.000-07:00

Dare to Celebrate the Female Form--Especially Yours!

Mark your calendars NOW! April 13-15, 2007

We leave from Los Angeles on Carnival Cruise Line, sail to Ensanada Mexico and back again.

Two points: 1) This trip leaves on a LUCKY Friday the 13th. Celebrate!
2) We are using this trip as a floating hotel with no intention of leaving the ship!

This will be a powerful and empowering look at what makes each of us the unique individual that we are while providing the tools necessary to take your life and every interaction to a whole new level.

The overriding arc of the programs will address YOU in relation to the word WORTHY--worthy to be seen, worthy to be heard, worthy to be loved, worthy to be valued. In my experience, few women, young or old have their worth strongly defined and at the core of their existence.

Men are welcome as there will be events for them plus a special male vs. female communication segment that will certainly entertain but more importantly unplug some of the misery that occurs when men and women don't acknowledge the beautiful differences in our biological purpose and communication/bonding styles. If you want to turn your man into an absolute soul-mate, this segment will do it!!!

This Cruise would also be a great Mother/Daughter event or even better Mother/Daughter/Granddaughter event. It is never too early for our young girls to learn that who they are and that the bodies they were genetically given are gift enough.

Dare to Celebrate the Female Form! I double dog dare you!!!!

For cost information and to reserve your place click this link to Legendary World now!

http://www.signaturetravelnetwork.com/product/cruise/dsp_OfferOutput.cfm?lcFlag=0&cruiseFinderSearch=0&offer_id=131718&product_id=230&sup_id=160&utp=consumer&agency_id=299&type=consumer&CFID=23742069&CFTOKEN=16484484&showLogo=1

Use code: CJBLOG and get $50 off per person on these low Cruise prices.

Our cruise specialist is Adele McIntosh, simply the best!

And as a shout out to Adele--I have been on several Cruise Seminars where service sucked (until I edit in a more appropriate word). I have sailed under Adele's banner and her attention to detail means we will have as flawless an event as superhumanly possible as she pulled off superhuman magic last time. Of course no one to date has been able to work that magic on me personally so you all will just have to deal!!!!

The bonds formed on this trip will last a lifetime--plan on it!!!

Sign up NOW--I double dog dared you!!!!

Divine Diva Dish

2006-07-20T13:00:00.001-07:00

Diva Dish? Divine???

Absolutely! Just join us and see what it is all about. Debra with Magic in Words is taking me and my 'words' to a whole new level. Look forward to fun discussions, intense interactions and amazing insights as people 'in the know' share just the information that will make your life and business so much more powerful.

I highly recommend visiting Debra at www.magicinwords.com today and putting magic in your web presentation! Everything you see in this (and the previous two posts) was programed and up on my site in ONE DAY! What are you waiting for????

Debra is a Dish. Debra knows how to Dish!!! And the Diva part is her birthright! She will have you up and Dishing on your own in no time at VERY little expense. She never ceases to amaze!!!

Remember, this is a Blog--you can and should respond!!!

Does Style Matter?

2006-05-17T15:03:00.000-07:00

Style is just the outside of content, and content the inside of style, like the outside and the inside of the human body--both go together, they can't be separated. Jean-Luc Godard

I like it! ...CJ

2006-03-21T15:07:00.000-08:00

I was contacted by Margot Carmichael Lester for an article on Mid-Life Dating. She isn't sure exactly where I will get quoted but I am going to post our question and answer dialogue:

Margot: Please comment for a story on dating a widow/er:

1) What's the most important thing to remember when dating a widow/er? Why?

Some widow/ers were in love with their mate, others weren't. I personally would prefer the grieving lover to the newly escaped... Some also have issues with realizing too late how much they really did love their spouse but didn't show/voice it clearly. I find those with regrets have the most fragile psychology to deal with.

Everyone grieves in their own way, some openly, some quietly. As the potential new love interest, your sense of self needs to be centered enough to allow the widow/er to deal with putting their passed love in perspective and THEN discovering where you might fit in their future. If you need immediate assurances, move one. You do not have a right to interfere with another human's need to make sense of their pain. Be there for them, listen, support and validate that love for their mate may change but does not need to lessen over time. Someone who truly loved their spouse will eventually be able to truly love you too, but only in their own time. When you encourage and validate the love they have felt, chances are good that that love will move forward towards you.

2) When is it ok to ask about the former spouse? And how can you start that conversation?

As soon as I knew I was with a widow/er, I would say something like, "I'm so sorry for your loss. I can't imagine such pain. I'd love to hear about your wife/husband whenever you feel like talking." You see, I really do want to know how deeply this individual can love because I want to be loved deeply too and this person may be a good candidate!

3. Some daters feel jealous of the strong feelings widow/ers have for their former spouses. What are two "reality checks" for these folks to help them deal with their feelings without hurting those of the widow/er?

Just go with it for pity's sake! How do YOU want to be loved? What if YOU predeceased the love of your life? Do you want their loneliness to follow them to their grave or do you want to have the love you had for each other move forward? Wouldn't you hope the new love to be 'fond' of YOUR memory?

A bigger question may be 'How well do YOU love?' not the widow/er. Join the widow/er in embracing their lost love. I suggest creating shrines, speaking highly of the departed and celebrating the fact that you are getting time with this marvelous human being, truly a gift from the departed. Treat the deceased like your best friend. The heart is big enough for both you and the deceased. You should be big enough to share.

Each mind takes its own time to adjust. The widow/er may remember their spouse as magical. Join their thinking and you take on magic of your own.

4. What else should daters know about going out with a widow/er? Why?

Many have not dated in years and have no idea how to even approach the process. There may be a lingering sense of 'cheating' that must be worked through. Unless you're recently single and unskilled yourself, your dating skills should include the ability to be still and let this wonderful human being (as you've already ascertained) move toward you.

So Dear Blog Reader--if you hear or see any of this out there, let me know. Margot is an advice Columnist and Feature Writer for Match.com and love.msn.com.

We're Having Fun Now!

2006-03-01T15:00:00.000-08:00

The mid-life dating seminar is in full swing! Every man is going to want to meet this group of fabulous women. Our discussions are leading to a real and abiding appreciation for self as well as for all men. This is a concept new to many and the excitement mounts as attitudes change.

There are secrets we will not tell but just know that there is a group of women who have made room in their closets for the one who's meant to be. If you don't think that's a big deal, you don't know a woman's closet!

Adore, adoring and adorable. Words to live by!

More later!

A Whole New Year! An Exciting New Start!

2006-02-03T17:01:00.000-08:00

Things have been a little quiet but not anymore! There's a whole new role to play and here I come! I promise to be gentle.

I gave up the struggle to launch my direct selling company in late fall, licked my wounds and am back out the door doing what I love best--talking! Now I'm doing it with more purpose, focus and hopefully content. Sometimes a door slammed in your face just knocks sense into your head--that's the case for me this time.

My true passion, to create a world where each woman's sense of self is pure and alive with passion for living, is now my total focus. My first major seminar of the year will start February 21st here at the Studio. Titled The Do's and Don'ts of Mid-Life Dating, it will address learning a 'soul-mate' attitude while debunking the twin myths, "All the Good Ones are Taken" and "Men Only Want Younger Women."

Watch for news of the fun we cause as we take what we know to the streets! Adorable! Count on it!

Word of Mouth

2005-08-09T15:32:00.000-07:00

As we strive for success, great word of mouth is every business owner's dream--rightfully so! Six instances of 25 people telling 25 people about your business is nearly the population of the United States. Mindbending but true!

CLAUD!A JEAN on Record

2005-06-29T14:06:00.000-07:00

From Pam in Portland, OR!

Pam's youngest daughter, Kim, is a social worker for the Dept of Human Resources in Multnomah County.

During a hearing on June 28th with a troubled teen, as the proceedings were ending, one of the attorneys asked Kim about her CLAUD!A JEAN watch. This precipitated a discussion about both the watch and Pam's business. The judge finally jumped in to find out what was so interesting--and to remind them that the conversation was still being recorded by the court clerk!

So you see, CLAUD!A JEAN is now a matter of court record in Multnomah County!

Soroptimist Fashion Voyage

2005-06-27T15:03:00.000-07:00

June 25--Officer's Club, Pendleton Marine Base: You have been to fashion shows, I am sure, but I doubt you've seen many amateur productions as well executed as this one! The Soroptimist Club women worked hard to make this the "must attend" event of the season!

The Soroptimists are a service organization dedicated to bettering the lives of women and children around the world. They prove that small groups of women, banded together, can achieve BIG results!

Before the fashion show, three women were honored for their contribution to a better world. First was Melanie Bernhardt who has become a renowned dog rescuer and trainer for assist- dogs for the disabled. This may not seem too impressive until you meet Melanie in person. She is confined to a wheelchair and has very limited mobility. Her great wit and sense of life had us all laughing and cheering her on. To date she has rescued, trained and placed 25 dogs.

Next was Theresia Heyden who has just recently returned from Afghanistan where she set up a school for over 2000 young girls near the border with Pakistan. Before this last election in Afghanistan, the Taliban tried to get past her to find out who on her staff had signed up to vote. She refused them entrance because she knew there could be bloodshed. In the process they broke the toes on both of her feet but she still refused to let them in. What is even more extraordinary is that this beautiful, strong woman is 81 years old! And she is returning to Afghanistan soon to continue with her work!

The final honoree was Luawanna Hallstrom who is known through out the state for her work on immigration and farm issues as well as education, environment, health and human rights. She serves on multiple commissions and travels through out the world with her message of economic stability through immigration and social reform to create secure borders--a very hot topic right now!

Congratulations to these three wonderful women, you are each a true inspiration to all of us!

After lunch the Fashion Voyage set sail with spirited music and beautiful fashions. The models danced through special routines set on a tall stage so everyone got an "eye full" of each presentation! CLAUD!A JEAN had the great fortune to be the first store featured with the song "Sea Cruise." I was proud of how the girls looked and we received may compliments on our fashions!

Other local boutiques followed as well as Chico's. We may be small but we held our own in a world of beautiful products! Susan and I also did a pretty good job of creating buzz about the Magic Pant, you can be sure!

The silent auction was well received so that there will be more money to give to great causes. I cannot recommend the Soroptimists more highly as a group of WONDERFUL women who really do make a difference and have a great deal of fun doing it!

Belong to the Red Hatters for you! (see the next article)
Belong to the Soroptimists for the world! see www.soroptimist.org or www.sioceanside.org
Not a bad balance!

Comments?

Red Hat Festivities

2005-06-27T14:21:00.000-07:00

June 5th--San Marcos Country Club was host to a BIG to-do involving nearing 250 Red Hatters from multiple Chapters. I was invited to speak and was so honored to be considered part of the party! Bonnie Armstrong, Queen of the California Dreamers Chapter, was the power behind (and in front of) this massive undertaking. She left no detail unattended! If you ever need crowd control, she's your go-to gal! I was amazed at her seamless event because it was a complex mix of vendors, belly dancers, fashion show and just sheer fun and yet she could marshall the crowd at will. Stunningly done, Bonnie! There is a reason you are Queen!

I've seen Red Hatters in small groups but this was my first exposure to such a large group and I have to tell you--these girls know how to have fun! Club members dressed "in their colors" had so many beautiful ways to wear red and purple that the whole room looked royal indeed! Gorgeous themed products could be seen both on the women and offered for sale. There was a lot of excitement and conversation about where to find the most beautiful and unusual pieces! It was easy to spend the day ooohing and ahhhhhing.

If you've never been exhausted from the sheer joy of having fun, check out the Red Hatters! All women are welcome but you only wear red and purple after the age of 50. Before that you wear pink and lavender as you are just in training for such a good time! Learn more at www.redhatsociety.com where the only rule is to have fun!

Momhood in a Nutshell

2005-06-01T11:26:00.000-07:00

Did any of you, like me, come home from the hospital with a perfect newborn baby and feel abject terror over the responsibility required to do everything right from that day forward? I know I did and do live in the sense of fear that who I am will not be enough to properly nourish those in my life who deserve a true, pure love.

John Rosemond, family psychologist, has written a short piece in The Union Tribune by way of Knight Ridder News Service. This simple blueprint will let you know when you are on the right path. I found it very easy to understand in a world of too much conflicting information!

He writes:
In the early 1960s, songwriter-folk singer Pete Seeger wrote "Turn, Turn, Turn," which was later rocked up and made popular by The Byrds. The refrain was taken from The Book of Ecclesiastes 3:1, which read, "There is a time for everything, and a season to every activity under heaven."

The raising of children is marked by seasons. Season One, the season of service, begins at birth and lasts for two years during which parents orbit around the child in a near-constant ministry of "doing." In all cultures and in all times, the mother is the primary servant during Season One. The child, therefore, has every right to come to the conclusion that the way things are now is the way things will be forever--that his mother is there to do things for him.

Knowing that she was creating a monster, the old-fashioned mother, between her child's second and third birthdays, corrected his impression of the role she played in his life. She did so by taking him out of the center of her attention and putting herself at the center of his, by making him do for himself what she had one for him, and by making it clear that her relationship with his father trumped her relationship with him.

By the time he was 3 years old, he saw her with new eyes: once a servant, now a formidable authority figure. He knew she loved him, but he also knew that her word was law. Thus began Season Two, the season of leadership and authority, during which the parents' job is to govern the child such that he gradually develops the self-restraint necessary to govern himself responsibly during Season Three, the season of mentoring, which commences at age 13.

It is no coincidence that that early adolescent rites of passage of traditional cultures--the Jewish bar or bat mitzvah being an example--occur when a child is 13. These rituals mark and celebrate a major transition in the parent-child relationship. The child is self-governing. He no longer needs people telling him what to do, running his life; rather, he needs mentors to help him prepare for emancipation which inaugurates Season Four, the season of friendship.

These days, the raising of children is rarely occurring in accord with its natural seasons. The ubiquitous symptoms, in reverse order: boomerang children and late emancipation; disrespectful, self-destructive, depressed, irresponsible teenagers; and toddler characteristics (short attention span, impulsivity, low tolerance for frustration, tantrums, defiance, and so on--i.e., ADD) still exhibited well beyond toddlerhood.

The breakdown is occurring between the second and third birthdays, when it is critical that the mother effect and complete the transition between Season One and Season two, from servant-ship to leadership. This transition took place rather reliably up until some 50 years ago. It takes place rarely today, because the American mother no longer receives the support that she needs to bring about this critical change in her child's perception of her. The new standard has it that a good mother is one who serves her child in perpetuity.

He finishes by saying:

I salute those moms who duck cultural pressure and claim their authority over their children, transforming them from little tyrants into well-mannered little people. Don't let the dirty looks bring you down, ladies.

I list the four Seasons for review:

Season One, the season of service, ages 0-2
Transition from Season One to Season Two, age 3
Season Two, the season of authority/leadership, ages 3-13
Season Three, the season of mentoring, ages 13-18
Season Four, the season of friendship, age 19 and a lifetime!

I predict that if you follow this formula the teen years will be some the richest you will spend with your children rather than the most terrifying!

Comments please!

You May End Up Naked!

2005-05-26T15:32:00.000-07:00

At our recent retreat, Suzi told how she sold her CLAUD!A JEAN necklace, at a customer's insistence, off her own neck. Lorraine took the story to heart and has reported one of her own!

While checking in at the Portland International Airport, the lady behind Lorraine commented on her necklace and said she'd love to have one. Lorraine responded that she could actually sell her the one she was wearing because she had another at home. The transaction was completed before they reached the ticket counter. It gets better! The lady is a buyer for Nordstrom!

There's more! As Lorraine stood on the gangway to board the plane, the lady behind her commented on her "window bag" of jewelry and then had to have one of the watches. Lorraine told her the price and they proceeded to their respective seats. The flight attendant brought Lorraine the check before the plane pulled away from the gate!

Michele has had similar stories and worries that she will sell the last of an item and end up without one of her own! It could happen as merchandise is selling out daily and being replace with new product.

We suggest that every time you wear an accessory that gets you noticed (the whole point!), carry one in your purse so when someone comments you can pull it out and say, "I just happen to have one available..." That's the beauty of cash and carry!

Feel free to add your story!

It's Not Just a Pant!

2005-05-25T11:32:00.000-07:00

I love when someone just cuts to the essence! Alison sent our famous black pant in XS Tall to one of her Sorority Sisters, Jen, for critique. To Jen's surprise, her husband remarked (in a very personal way) as to how good she looked as soon as she put them on. He is not normally someone to notice, let alone comment! Score One!

She wore the pant, played in the pant and worked in the pant. Her final comment?

"This is the 'little black dress' of pants!"

Enough said! Thanks for the perfect twist on our signature piece!

PS Jen is Senior VP of one of the world's largest PR/Ad agencies. Clarity sells! Thanks for the free pitch, Jen!

Great Thoughts I

2005-05-06T09:56:00.000-07:00

This quote is a personal favorite that I have posted on the wall in front of my desk:

"The test of a first-class mind is the ability to hold two opposing views... at the same time and still retain the ability to function." F. Scott Fitzgerald.

It makes politics, religion and people in general more interesting than threatening if you try to understand where their beliefs originate. When we're open to discussion, we're open to new knowledge. "Knowing it all" is the ultimate bore!

Great Thoughts II

2005-05-06T09:54:00.000-07:00

While on the phone with Allen Vine, a good friend (and clothing vendor), I shared the above quote. He in turn handed his favorite to me! I love how strong it is!

"The true measure of a man is not how he acts in times of comfort and convenience, but rather, how he stands at times of conflict and challenge." Martin Luther King

Allen has definitely used and met this measure as he makes his difference in the world. His integrity and ability to work through tough times (which pretty well describes the apparel business itself!) is unparalleled.

Do you have a defining quote that inspires you on a daily basis? Please share!

What a Month!

2005-05-03T17:20:00.000-07:00

April was a banner month here in San Diego! It started with an unexpected North County Times feature on the front of the business section. Yea! The contacts are still coming in on that press. We also had a wonderful four minute segment on KUSI-TV. I spoke to the Lady Lions, a most lively group, The Pendleton Military Base "Heart Beats" Club and was a featured author/speaker for the American Assoc. of University Women's (Poway Branch) annual luncheon. Wow! Wow! I shared the podium with Susan Vreeland and Bonnie Marston. Wow! I'm feeling just a little like a rock star! The big thing is that our message of healthy self esteem is a hit and women want to know more.

As if that weren't enough, we finished the month with our fabulous Coaches from Portland, Lorraine and Pam, in town to share insights with the wonderful women of San Diego. There were awards aplenty to Suzi, Pam, Lorraine, Michele, Beth, Carlyn, Cathie, and Leslie. Susan had us in stitches with her story about having a tag on the back of her necklace at a big event but it all led to her getting to talk about her business! For those who couldn't be here, we missed you and you missed a great time.

Feel free to comment!

More True Than Funny

2005-04-22T17:35:00.000-07:00

I don't know about you but I actually used a slide rule during college. Those of you under 50 probably have no idea what a I'm talking about but slide rules were a particularly brutal form of torture that functioned as a primitive calculator and were a necessary evil in a number of science classes. Well, we're not in Kansas anymore, Dorothy! See how dependent, demanding and consumed we are for information today...

You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your three family members!

Your daughter sells Girl Scout Cookies over her Web site.

You chat several times a day with a friend in London but you haven't spoken to your neighbors in months.

You call from your own driveway to see if anyone is home.

Your excuse for not staying in touch with some family members is because they don't have email.

You just tried to enter your password on the microwave...

Time to take a rest, a walk and a smell of the roses! But I'm still glad the slide rule has been retired or cast into oblivion. Has anyone even seen one in an antique mall? I haven't and I would probably buy one just to terrorize my nieces!

Movers & Shakers

2005-04-22T11:37:00.000-07:00

I don't know about you but I swear I have a couch potato gene. My idea of a perfect break from work is to sit and read and/or talk on the phone. I start my morning about 5 AM and read The San Diego Union Tribune and the Wall Street Journal as "my time." I am usually at work about 9 AM and spend most of the day behind my desk. Sounds pretty couchy, huh?

Well, I'm now walking every morning between reading the papers and getting to work and I actually look forward to that walk for the first time in my 56 years. Here's the insight that finally got me moving and WANTING to move.

We have two very important bilateral systems in our body that are critical to our good health. One is the circulatory system whose pump is the heart. We all understand about blood pressure and cholesterol yada yada yada. That knowledge never made me want to exercise. The teammate of the circulatory system is the lymph system. It's pump? Our muscles. Oops! If we don't move neither does the lymph. So? The lymph system is rather like a sludge system designed to transport the toxins to the proper organs for processing and removal from our bodies. IF I DON'T MOVE that sludge has no way to reach the proper processing centers! That's why I am walking.

20 minutes a day does the trick! No marathons necessary. Swing your arms and breath deeply through your nose to affect the whole system. 20 minutes is all it takes to know you've given your body the motion it needs to support a healthy long life and you all know I'm aiming for a sweet 120!

Let me know how you become motivated and find time to step out!