CLAUD!A JEAN on Record

From Pam in Portland, OR!

Pam's youngest daughter, Kim, is a social worker for the Dept of Human Resources in Multnomah County.

During a hearing on June 28th with a troubled teen, as the proceedings were ending, one of the attorneys asked Kim about her CLAUD!A JEAN watch. This precipitated a discussion about both the watch and Pam's business. The judge finally jumped in to find out what was so interesting--and to remind them that the conversation was still being recorded by the court clerk!

So you see, CLAUD!A JEAN is now a matter of court record in Multnomah County!

Soroptimist Fashion Voyage

June 25--Officer's Club, Pendleton Marine Base: You have been to fashion shows, I am sure, but I doubt you've seen many amateur productions as well executed as this one! The Soroptimist Club women worked hard to make this the "must attend" event of the season!

The Soroptimists are a service organization dedicated to bettering the lives of women and children around the world. They prove that small groups of women, banded together, can achieve BIG results!

Before the fashion show, three women were honored for their contribution to a better world. First was Melanie Bernhardt who has become a renowned dog rescuer and trainer for assist- dogs for the disabled. This may not seem too impressive until you meet Melanie in person. She is confined to a wheelchair and has very limited mobility. Her great wit and sense of life had us all laughing and cheering her on. To date she has rescued, trained and placed 25 dogs.

Next was Theresia Heyden who has just recently returned from Afghanistan where she set up a school for over 2000 young girls near the border with Pakistan. Before this last election in Afghanistan, the Taliban tried to get past her to find out who on her staff had signed up to vote. She refused them entrance because she knew there could be bloodshed. In the process they broke the toes on both of her feet but she still refused to let them in. What is even more extraordinary is that this beautiful, strong woman is 81 years old! And she is returning to Afghanistan soon to continue with her work!

The final honoree was Luawanna Hallstrom who is known through out the state for her work on immigration and farm issues as well as education, environment, health and human rights. She serves on multiple commissions and travels through out the world with her message of economic stability through immigration and social reform to create secure borders--a very hot topic right now!

Congratulations to these three wonderful women, you are each a true inspiration to all of us!

After lunch the Fashion Voyage set sail with spirited music and beautiful fashions. The models danced through special routines set on a tall stage so everyone got an "eye full" of each presentation! CLAUD!A JEAN had the great fortune to be the first store featured with the song "Sea Cruise." I was proud of how the girls looked and we received may compliments on our fashions!

Other local boutiques followed as well as Chico's. We may be small but we held our own in a world of beautiful products! Susan and I also did a pretty good job of creating buzz about the Magic Pant, you can be sure!

The silent auction was well received so that there will be more money to give to great causes. I cannot recommend the Soroptimists more highly as a group of WONDERFUL women who really do make a difference and have a great deal of fun doing it!

Belong to the Red Hatters for you! (see the next article)
Belong to the Soroptimists for the world! see www.soroptimist.org or www.sioceanside.org
Not a bad balance!

Comments?

Red Hat Festivities

June 5th--San Marcos Country Club was host to a BIG to-do involving nearing 250 Red Hatters from multiple Chapters. I was invited to speak and was so honored to be considered part of the party! Bonnie Armstrong, Queen of the California Dreamers Chapter, was the power behind (and in front of) this massive undertaking. She left no detail unattended! If you ever need crowd control, she's your go-to gal! I was amazed at her seamless event because it was a complex mix of vendors, belly dancers, fashion show and just sheer fun and yet she could marshall the crowd at will. Stunningly done, Bonnie! There is a reason you are Queen!

I've seen Red Hatters in small groups but this was my first exposure to such a large group and I have to tell you--these girls know how to have fun! Club members dressed "in their colors" had so many beautiful ways to wear red and purple that the whole room looked royal indeed! Gorgeous themed products could be seen both on the women and offered for sale. There was a lot of excitement and conversation about where to find the most beautiful and unusual pieces! It was easy to spend the day ooohing and ahhhhhing.

If you've never been exhausted from the sheer joy of having fun, check out the Red Hatters! All women are welcome but you only wear red and purple after the age of 50. Before that you wear pink and lavender as you are just in training for such a good time! Learn more at www.redhatsociety.com where the only rule is to have fun!

Momhood in a Nutshell

Did any of you, like me, come home from the hospital with a perfect newborn baby and feel abject terror over the responsibility required to do everything right from that day forward? I know I did and do live in the sense of fear that who I am will not be enough to properly nourish those in my life who deserve a true, pure love.

John Rosemond, family psychologist, has written a short piece in The Union Tribune by way of Knight Ridder News Service. This simple blueprint will let you know when you are on the right path. I found it very easy to understand in a world of too much conflicting information!

He writes:
In the early 1960s, songwriter-folk singer Pete Seeger wrote "Turn, Turn, Turn," which was later rocked up and made popular by The Byrds. The refrain was taken from The Book of Ecclesiastes 3:1, which read, "There is a time for everything, and a season to every activity under heaven."

The raising of children is marked by seasons. Season One, the season of service, begins at birth and lasts for two years during which parents orbit around the child in a near-constant ministry of "doing." In all cultures and in all times, the mother is the primary servant during Season One. The child, therefore, has every right to come to the conclusion that the way things are now is the way things will be forever--that his mother is there to do things for him.

Knowing that she was creating a monster, the old-fashioned mother, between her child's second and third birthdays, corrected his impression of the role she played in his life. She did so by taking him out of the center of her attention and putting herself at the center of his, by making him do for himself what she had one for him, and by making it clear that her relationship with his father trumped her relationship with him.

By the time he was 3 years old, he saw her with new eyes: once a servant, now a formidable authority figure. He knew she loved him, but he also knew that her word was law. Thus began Season Two, the season of leadership and authority, during which the parents' job is to govern the child such that he gradually develops the self-restraint necessary to govern himself responsibly during Season Three, the season of mentoring, which commences at age 13.

It is no coincidence that that early adolescent rites of passage of traditional cultures--the Jewish bar or bat mitzvah being an example--occur when a child is 13. These rituals mark and celebrate a major transition in the parent-child relationship. The child is self-governing. He no longer needs people telling him what to do, running his life; rather, he needs mentors to help him prepare for emancipation which inaugurates Season Four, the season of friendship.

These days, the raising of children is rarely occurring in accord with its natural seasons. The ubiquitous symptoms, in reverse order: boomerang children and late emancipation; disrespectful, self-destructive, depressed, irresponsible teenagers; and toddler characteristics (short attention span, impulsivity, low tolerance for frustration, tantrums, defiance, and so on--i.e., ADD) still exhibited well beyond toddlerhood.

The breakdown is occurring between the second and third birthdays, when it is critical that the mother effect and complete the transition between Season One and Season two, from servant-ship to leadership. This transition took place rather reliably up until some 50 years ago. It takes place rarely today, because the American mother no longer receives the support that she needs to bring about this critical change in her child's perception of her. The new standard has it that a good mother is one who serves her child in perpetuity.

He finishes by saying:

I salute those moms who duck cultural pressure and claim their authority over their children, transforming them from little tyrants into well-mannered little people. Don't let the dirty looks bring you down, ladies.

I list the four Seasons for review:

Season One, the season of service, ages 0-2
Transition from Season One to Season Two, age 3
Season Two, the season of authority/leadership, ages 3-13
Season Three, the season of mentoring, ages 13-18
Season Four, the season of friendship, age 19 and a lifetime!

I predict that if you follow this formula the teen years will be some the richest you will spend with your children rather than the most terrifying!

Comments please!